Break Free

Now i truly do not believe that hard work will be followed by success. Imagine working out, being fully muscular, strong and full of passion. Then the goal is to work hard so that you cant walk through a wall with all your might. Ain't gonna work out. Thing is hard work has to go the correct place otherwise it's all effort down the drain. Maybe, just maybe that after years of trying to walk through a wall might create some cracks in the concrete but it doesn't change the fact that you're not gonna make it through.

The thing is this. If you're determined to make it through the wall, use a hammer, use a bulldozer and not just simply walking into the wall and hoping to make it to the other side. That's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna achieve something. I'm gonna prove that success doesn't have to be achieved through conventional ways. Who knows i might be able to break stupid stereotypes along the way? If i can't convince one out of their insecurities, I'll break their lousy stereotypes by proving them wrong.

Now excuse me for I have a hurdle in the form of Army to clear.

Bottom of my valley

Everyone has their ups and downs certain points in their lives. I wouldn't deny being at one of the lowest valley right now and with no one for support. Even for some whom i heavily depend on has left me. Never have i been so low in my life before.

I watched the Pursuit Of Happyness back in Nepal and i could relate to the protagonist. He was sinking into poverty and just when he needed his wife for support most, she left him. Then he has the impossible climb to make by feeding not just himself but also his son. Not just that, he needs to work hard in order to land himself a steady job. Its by his superhuman willpower that he managed to scrape through and finally achieve something significant. Mind you, this was based on a true story!

Thinking back on the movie now, it reminds me of myself. It brings me back to the cold hard reality that makes life what it is. Many times, it's not just laziness that landed me in this state (which some people would like to think). Sometimes, its a series of soul-sickening failures and defeats, missed opportunities, sure things that didn't quite happen, bad luck and bad choices that have gotten me where i am. To some, these factors may just be excuses but for those who haven't been in my shoes, they wouldn't know how much things like bad choices and luck can destroy a person.

People have left me like how the wife left the protagonist. It doesn't feel good at all and it's another effort to pull me right to the bottom of my valley. It has already happened, but now i have a mountain to climb. I'll make sure i pull myself out of this pit. It's never gonna be easy climbing the enormous mountain that i have fallen, but I'll do it

D-Day

Its the end of attachment and of course I'm really glad! However, the make or break point for me is what comes at 2pm later. I'm jittery all over and after what happened with the O level results, i don't dare to raise my hopes. As of now I'm preparing for the worst. What makes it worse is that I don't have a good feeling about it.

Anyway, all the best to the rest who are in the same boat as me. Hope you guys ain't feeling what i feel now.